How I sold my mission to the devil

When studying the Bible, I was guided by the principle that I should apply it personally to myself. It was a wrong principle.

Once I asked God what would happen to my city, Perm (Russia), and I found a few words in the Pentateuch of Moses with the letters PRM (this is the name of the city written in modern Hebrew). I began to read the Old Testament without vowels, because initially Moses and other prophets wrote without vowels (Jews added vowels only in the Middle Ages).

I translated the first fragment: (Leviticus 10) “Moses said: You will not be in Perm and you will not die … but your brothers all the house of Israel will cry for the seraph, who is the seraph of the Lord. Do not go out of the doors of the church tent, lest you die, because the oil of anointing (Christ) of the Lord is upon you. They did as Moses said,” etc. I decided that it was I who was the “anointed one”, because no one except me wanted to learn Hebrew and this message could only be addressed to me.

After a more detailed analysis of the text, which I omit, I came to the conclusion that I would be a missionary in Africa, live in a tent and preach in a large church tent. I am immortal, that is, I am guaranteed to live until the Second Coming and I will never die. I am an “anointed one” (like a king or a prophet) and in me there is a seraph (spirit of fire). I will become very rich, famous and will lead to repentance a lot of people. Everything will be done as Moses said.

The following fragment (Leviticus 13) with the letters PRM convinced me that I would not be in Perm, that I would “cry unclean! unclean!”, that is, declare people their sins (using psychoanalysis) and live separately outside the “camp” (not in the city).

Continuing to look for PRM, I found: (Leviticus 21) “The great priest of his brothers, on whose head the Anointing oil was poured, and who was consecrated to put on his clothes, should not bare his head and would not be in Perm … He should not touch, he should not be defiled by his father and his mother … And he should not depart from the church and dishonor the church of God, because the consecration with the oil of the anointing (Christ) of God is upon him. I am the Lord. In the wife he must take a mother-virgin …”

I am a great missionary, I thought, so “great priest” is about me. I decided that my parents were zombies and began to try not to touch my father and mother and not to make electrical contact with them at all in order not to be defiled (my mother touched me stubbornly, once I threatened her with an ax so that she would stop touching me: anyway they are zombies, I thought).

About mother-virgin, I first decided that I would marry a cloned girl and did not even think about St. Mary. Someone convinced me that I should marry St. Mary.

I quarreled on a religious matter with a company of young Pentecostal Charismatics. They became very angry. It was absolutely clear that they want to kill me. I began to run away, but I got a deadend.

That time I still had strength, like Samson, and I could cope with the company that attacked me, but I decided (I don’t know correctly or just chickened out, it doesn’t matter now) that if I start fighting, the whole city, a million people would raise against me (they would not understand who attacked whom) and I would not cope.

I decided to give up. I decided: If they break my head, then what will I be for a priest? There will be more harm than good from me.

But I thought that I could not not to become a priest and a missionary, because God told me that. Then I “invented”: I said to the devil: I will be the priest of St. Mary instead of the priest of God, if you do not beat me/kill me.

A team of the guys from the church came running, but there was not a trace of anger on their faces, the devil completed his part of the deal.

As befits a pagan priest, I began to engage in astral sex, as described below.

Then, in an unusual way, I translated from the Greek a fragment of the Gospel about the three women standing near the cross of Jesus. See here and further here. From this very interesting translation, I came to the conclusion that I should have sex with St. Mary and called her spirit. She flew in the form of a cloud and I did not recognize her, and fought against her with cosmic energy. Then at first we just flew together in the spirit (turning into clouds), then she flew under me and I shed rain on her. She really liked it and from that day we began to engage in astral sex in full. She asked me to start doing also masturbation and I began to do it.

I came to the conclusion that the spirit of Maria is on the daughter of Russian President Maria Putin and I should marry her. I either imagined her in various poses, or flew with her in the atmosphere or in space. What came of it to read here. (I expected that our unaccepted love would lead to a nuclear war).

All this nonsense ended with the fact that I realized that the era of the Church and the Gospel was coming to an end and The gospel cancels itself, just as it canceled the Old Testament.

Since the law of the gospel is no longer valid, then the deal with the devil is not valid. (Heb. 7:12) “Because with the change of the priesthood, there must be a change in a law.”

After that, I started a normal life. Now I am looking for a wife on a Christian dating site. I want her to believe me and know mathematics.

Of course, you can say that, probably, the prophecy did not come true, because I sold it to the devil. But if the prophecy may not come true because of me, what is the point of applying it to yourself?

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